25 More Humorous Thoughts For The Day

Hi there everyone!

Back in July, I uploaded a post entitled '25 Humorous thoughts for the day'. In this post, I shared some of my favourite funny thoughts and quotes that I discovered whilst browsing the web. I thought it would be fun to create a follow up post sharing some more of my favourite thoughts. If you missed the first post, I've included a link above! (I would certainly appreciate it if you took the time to read that one also!)


Let's hop right in!

1. You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine. - Tommy Cooper

 

2. Borrow money from pessimists, they don't expect it back.

 

3. Junk is something you've kept for years and throw away 3 weeks before you need it.

 

4. You need only 2 tools: WD-40 and Duct tape.
If it doesn't move and it should, use WD-40
If it moves and it shouldn't, use Duct tape.

 

5.The things that come to those who wait may be the things left by those who got there first.

 

6. Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.- Wendell Johnson

 

7. School teaches lessons and then gives us a test. Life gives us a test and then we learn the lessons from it.

 

8. I love cooking with wine. Sometimes I even put it in the food.

 

9. Worrying works! 90 percent of the things I worry about never happen.

 

10. It's not where you stand, but in which direction you're facing that matters. -Oliver Wendell Holmes

 

11. How long a minute is depends on which side of the bathroom door you're on.

 

12. 'Why do they call it 'rush hour' when nothing moves? -Robin Williams

 

13. The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.

 

14. In war, it doesn't matter who was right, but rather who was left.

 

15. Just because nobody complains doesn't mean all parachutes are perfect. -Benny Hill

 

16. I plan on living forever. So far, so good.

 

17. Life is an endless struggle full of frustrations and challenges, but eventually you find a hair stylist you like.

 

18. I'm tired of all this nonsense about beauty being only skin-deep. That's deep enough. What do you want, an adorable pancreas? -Jean Kerr

 

19. Living on earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip around the sun every year.

 

20. Dogs have owners. Cats have staff.

 

21. If you're too open minded, your brain might fall out.

 

22. Committee: a group of people who keep minutes but waste hours.

 

23. Cure for an obsession- get another one. -Mason Cooley

 

24. My theory is that all Scottish cuisine is based on a dare. - Mike Myers

 

25. Life may not be the party we hoped for, but whiles we're here we might as well dance.

Thank you so much for reading my post today!
Please let me know if you enjoyed it, I'd love to hear which one's you found amusing as well as if you have some funny thoughts to add!
If you did like this post, please make sure to share it with your friends!

I hope you all have a wonderful week and I look forward to chatting with you all again very soon!

Love Megan xo

25 Humorous thoughts for the day

Hello again 

I see tonnes of quotes and E-cards everyday on various websites that often make me smile and laugh, and can sometimes even be thought provoking. Today, I want to share a collection of humorous thoughts and quotes I’ve stumbled upon this past week. I hope that by reading this little list, I can help brighten your day!

I got the idea to do this post from Suzie81 Speaks, you can read her post here.

1. A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.

2. The fridge is a perfect example of what’s inside is what matters.

3. If money doesn’t grow on trees why do banks have branches?

4. Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a minute, but set him on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

5. If you have nothing to be grateful for, check your pulse.

6. Common sense is not so common.

7. If two ants elope, are they antelopes?

8. You can't have everything... where would you put it?

9. There is nothing more annoying than two people talking while you’re trying to interrupt.

10. The evening news is where they begin with ‘Good evening’, and then proceed to tell you why it isn’t.

11. Maybe the sun doesn’t want to be called hot, maybe it wants to be called beautiful.

12. At my funeral I’d like there to be a piñata so that people can be happy, but filled with bees so they’re not too happy.

13. The closest to perfection a person ever comes is when he fills out a job application form.

14. Even if you are on the right track, you will get run over if you just sit there.

15. Ham and eggs - A day's work for a chicken; A lifetime commitment for a pig.

16. The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

17. When you have a hammer in your hand everything around you starts looking like a nail.

18. Some days, you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue, just live with it.

19. When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

20. We live in an age where pizza gets to your home before police.

21. If you can't see the bright side of life, polish the dull side.

22. The most important thing in life is not knowing everything, it's having the phone number of somebody who does!

23. Duct tape is like the Force; it has a dark side, a light side, and it's what holds the universe together.

24. You grow up the day you have your first real laugh -- at yourself.

25. The real trouble with reality is that there's no background music.

If you know of any funny or clever quotes, or if you just enjoyed reading this post, be sure to leave a comment- I love reading you’re messages! Remember to check back on Monday when I share a lovely recipe with you all!

Just before I leave, I also want to add that I’ve been overwhelmed by the amount of support you all have given me especially over the past week. I really appreciate all the kind words and messages I’ve received, they mean so much to me! Thankyou from the bottom of my heart! :)

Have a beautiful day

 Love Megan xo